Recon Federation of Club Penguin

NORTHERN LIGHTS, UKAHALA: And by beginners we mean everybody needs to read this. And share it. Multiple times!

There seems to be lots of confusion about RFCP out there! Here on the official website we’ve come up with an easy, straightforward, 100% accurate crash course.

What RFCP Is:

• An army
• A loving family
• A pretty cool server with appropriate moderation and rules for safety

What RFCP Is Not:

• The devil
• A puppy killing factory
• A deep state mind control experiment
• A republic/democracy*

* We know this is scary to some! But actually we are happy with our government! And our voices actually ARE taken into account before big decisions are made, proven by the fact that we have: a suggestion box, army-wide conferences in #rfcp-summit, polls, office hours weekly, a support channel, and a “leave server” button, which can be clicked any time!

What Prior Bumble Is:

• A leader
• A dude
• Someone who enjoys having power*
• Good with words and connecting emotionally**
• A human being with flaws***

* And we enjoy him in power because usually he is pretty dope with it!

** Emotional manipulation! Aaaaa!

*** Yep! Including a temper and some off-color jokes. Which he often acknowledges and apologizes for.

What Prior Bumble Is Not:

• The devil
• The owner of the puppy killing factory
• Any of these ridiculous (and illegal!) claims of being a pedophile

What Some People Call RFCP and We Really Don’t Care at this Point:

• A cult

What Cannot Change the Above Facts:

• One open letter
• Two open letters
• Three open letters
• Four open letters
• Five open letters
• Six open letters
• Seven open letters
• Eight open letters
• Nine open letters
• A website lol
• Ten open letters

What If I Still Have Doubts?:

• Ask us for proof against the bad stuff! We’d love to talk to you!
• Come visit our server and see for yourself!
• Research real psychological phenomena of hivemind and groupthink to understand why there is so much hate against us if we are really not that bad.

Some out there will be annoyed by this ^ and say we need to be contrite. We’ve tried that, despite overwhelming evidence that we’re not axe murderers and that we haven’t committed the crimes so many other armies have and no one cares about (swaztika formations, doxxing, N-word usage, etc.). It still doesn’t get us anywhere. So THERE. ARE. THE. FACTS. READ THEM.

Share this! Read this! Read it OUT LOUD.

Signed,

Literally all of RFCP

If you’re enlisted, please comment with your approval (“Agreed” and any other remarks) if you want to make your support more public!

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