NORTHERN LIGHTS, UKAHALA: Join us for the most bizarre event of RFCP history you never knew.
Did you know that the RFCP server you are in right now was not the original RFCP server?
That’s right. Long ago, the first official RFCP server was owned and operated by SgtSpoon. For RFCP historians out there, SgtSpoon is known as the army’s first traitor. And he has been quite steeped in RFCP lore.
Spoon met Prior Bumble in the EPF room when RFCP was still just a role playing group that did not have a central messaging system. You heard us! In the early days, Recon Federation loyalists simply told each other on Club Penguin that they’d be back the next day–same time, same place–to continue the adventures. And they followed through! The army’s official name was first declared by Prior Bumble by a mere spoken chat bubble in-game as he sat in the EPF chair. No one got a screenshot.
Spoon introduced Prior to the website “Discord” and made a server. The server had no icon. It had basic channels such as #command, #news, #missions, and three chat rooms.
It also had a voice chat…
We all know the story (or do you? See history) of how Spoon betrayed Prior Bumble and exiled him from his own army server, forcing Prior to erect a new one, the one you dwell in today. But this is not the story of how Spoon became the first Benedict Arnold. This is the story of how Prior Bumble got the original server back, almost a year later.
On a Spring day in late April, a sense of injustice hit Prior upon considering the long lost server. Over the months, Spoon had turned the server into a crypt for anti-RFCP, housing people such as Anonting and other cronies. It resembled Pride Rock under Scar’s rule.
And so, determined to right this wrong, Prior contacted Dr. Redovyco–former Commissar and current Dean of the RFCP University–to put Prior in touch with Spoon.
A group chat was made.
Spoon metaphorically twisted his mustache when he learned Prior Bumble wanted something from him. At first, Prior asked for it nicely. After all, Spoon almost never used it.
But Spoon trolled and kept asking, “What server?”
Then, Dr. Red offered Nitro.
Spoon refused. Finally, the real offer hit the table.
Cash.
Prior offered $20 via PayPal for the original RFCP server. Spoon’s reply?
Amazingly, Prior Bumble agreed.
But then…
Fury boiled in both Prior and Redovyco, but both men kept their cool.
“Forty is plenty for a server that means nothing to you,” Prior went on. “$40 for ownership of the server. You’re giving nothing up; it’s free money to you.”
At that point, Spoon tried to negotiate for $50 each to himself and his friend (another RFCP belligerent, blonde_icon, otherwise known as Em). But Em pushed to finalize the deal.
Spoon said, “$60. Take it oR leave it.”
Again, astoundingly, Prior agreed.
But secret talks occurred between Prior and Redovyco–brothers who so much of RFCP’s current success is attributed to.
Dr. Redovyco agreed to share the burden of risk with Prior. And for that, we recognize him as an unsung RFCP hero. Sing him, dammit!
Afterwards, Spoon invited Prior Bumble to the original RFCP server. Prior said he will send 50% now, and 50% when the ownership was transferred. Reluctantly, Spoon accepted.
And the deed was done.
That is an historic, prize-winning photograph ^.
But then, when Spoon demanded the rest of the money…
Prior stripped his perms, took the server, and dashed.
Prior received several more official invoices from Spoon for the remainder of the $60, but Prior ignored them all.
Prior Bumble and Dr. Red got rid of them (banned) eventually of course…but not before playing with them with a little help from Pookie, who was an RFCP Uncle and Advisor at the time.
After all the trickery, cruelty, and trolling, it sure was nice for Prior to win one.
We hope you enjoyed this historic and important story.
What will become of the OG server now? Well, only Commander Prior and Dr. Red occupy it these days, as shrewd guardians of RFCP history. But Prior did have one idea.
“I may turn it into a museum,” he said, “with 30-minute admittance granted to soldiers who purchase a ticket with their Bumble Bucks.”
They’ll be able to look around in the sacred halls of the first server.
But we prefer this new server. The one Prior made himself. With all our family in it.
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