Recon Federation of Club Penguin

I do not know how to communicate with this audience anymore without being accused of emotional manipulation because I share my emotions, or being accused of being creepy/unstable/in it for something sinister because I share my love. If you are one of those people who think this way, I ask that you just not read the post. It’s a story from my life I want to share with my soldiers and a message of love from a personal experience I’ve lived. No one is forcing you to read it. Let me speak to my soldiers, and you are free to pass it over.

When my brother died, we planned a funeral. This is usually what people do.

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Vei’u da ere varu, ere rahuk’juks, ere huks. Dre wurvan granvar sch’ock, sum rec, x al jukkin chu’alk vei’u. Coolj teyon wess.

Er vhe ush mir wey:

Granvar sum vei’u f’yo al T. Nuvar lanu. Granvar sum vei’u.

R granvar? 2,100.

Prior Bumble granvar meyar RFCP, x RFCP granvar meyar Prior Bumble. 

Erat ipso sacra.

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NORTHERN LIGHTS, UKAHALA: ALL ARMIES should be concerned with the state of CPA at this time. RFCP addresses the current situation and challenges friend and foe to consider the problems in the community that impacted RFCP, but could affect them next.

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NORTHERN LIGHTS, Office of Prior Bumble— As time slowly continues to sweep the debris from the Peninsula Wars off the edges of the map, the body of RFCP awaits an address from their Commander on many in-between events and political happenings that have occurred in the past weeks.

Soldiers of RFCP,

Either it is that affairs in CPA move too quickly, or I move too slowly. Important is the process of recording them for both our archives and to satisfy my obligation of keeping you informed and debriefed troops. This post will enlighten on and discuss events including:

1. The three leaders’ polls and one petition Commander Prior voted in
2. Cosmic attempting to declare war on PZF
3. RPF declaring war on EGCP
4. DKA (formerly known as DD) declaring independence

Voting Record

The Commander’s obligation to report how he votes and moves in foreign affairs is one of the most important rights granted to every soldier by the Constitution. A lot of power rests on me. Only I vote to represent the entire RFCP, and my votes affect what happens in our world.

On August 24, after increasing tensions among NVA-leaning armies, Cena of DD presented and compiled signatures for a petition titled Petition 145367, aimed at removing CPA admin Greeny (aka, Trev) from his authoritative position. The movement struck rapidly, with signatures being collected overnight from at least one representative leader from every active army except for Cosmic and LGA. Although weeks and maybe even months of frustrations contributed to this action, some could pinpoint Cena’s conception of the idea to this tactic performed a few days before by RFCP at the Skates invasion (LGA soldiers fought under the alias of Cosmic):

The mantra “Greeny honestly please act more like an admin” caught on in the general conversation of the CPA Discord. Greeny added fuel to Cena’s flame the following morning when, after Cena challenged him, Greeny replied, “Cena honestly smd” (suck my d—).

Cena was not alone in his feelings about Greeny. As the founder of LGA, many, including myself, believed Greeny simply has too much invested in LGA to be a non-biased admin, and his behavior has a reputation for being crude and combative, going against the grain of professionalism and levelheadedness the community expects from an admin. Greeny was never allowed to judge LGA battles. But what about battles waged between an LGA enemy and an LGA ally? The lines become questionable.

Soon, the petition was drafted and shown to Prior, who helped Cena proof it. It read as follows:

We, the undersigned leaders of CPA, petition for the reassignment of admin Greeny, to a non-judicial, non-authoritative, non-admin role in Club Penguin Armies. Our reasons are:

1. Greeny is extremely active as a leader in a current CPA army (LGA). Even if he is not allowed to judge LGA battles, he judges battles waged by LGA’s enemies and other politically sensitive events and polls

2. Greeny has demonstrated biased, rude, and un-admin-like behavior frequently. In our view, this does not represent how a fair, level, and respectful admin should behave. We, the undersigned leaders, express gratitude to Greeny in the other work he has done for the community and offer suggestions of reassigning him to other roles such as event planner, social media manager, graphic designer, or another non-authoritative position. We support calling forward a new admin, if one be willing. If our petition is refused, we will refuse to acknowledge Greeny as an admin going forward, including his vote in matters of battle, and if our boycott is not reflected on the CPA map and elsewhere, we will form and operate under our own map.

PETITION NUMBER: 145367

I added my signature to the following list of leaders, and one CPA staff member (DEF246). Some included a disclaimer that the process of operating in CPA with a different map would be discussed at a later time. RPF included a disclaimer that Greeny should remain an admin in other ways, but be removed completely from a judicial position. Cena noted to me that one factor that convinced RPF to sign was noticing how Greeny and I have been getting into it in the CPA leaders’ channel, and they perhaps knew my temperament well enough to know I wouldn’t get riled up for nothing.

Upon seeing the petition, DMT suggested that Cena instead make a Discord server to hammer out more concrete demands. Cena felt this was unnecessarily complicating it, with the 12 signatures speaking for themselves.

The admins discussed the petition and came back with a proposal to not allow Greeny to vote in any battle, but to still be an admin behind the war zone. Cena countered that it should be put to a formal vote in leaders’ chat with the options being A) Remove Greeny as an admin and B) Keep Greeny as an admin but disallow him to vote in any battle or have a voice of authority in such matters. I felt this was fair.

However, things soon fell apart. Upon being confronted with the reality of the petition, and after questioning by DMT (who felt that some of the signers didn’t really understand what they were committing to), EGCP and RPF, two of CPA’s biggest players, backed out. This absolutely gutted the petition. RPF especially, as the one non-NVA army, gave validity to the petition, and their withdrawal spelled disaster for the movement.

The petition was killed, and the admins withdrew even their original counter. Greeny’s position did not change save for the fact that he was spoken to by the other admins about his verbiage and behavior on the Discord. He pledged to be more professional.

I took this sequence of events hard. The petition was serious to me, but EGCP was more divided on the matter than they originally led me to believe. Their retreat from the cause, without talking to me first, left me looking foolish. Of course, with RFCP being LGA’s largest enemy, many in our army felt that RFCP had the most at stake with this petition. I took an overnight respite from the NVA leader’s chat to decompress, announcing that it was just a short break to brush off my feelings. EGCP leaders expressed their apologies. The next morning, I returned, eager to get back to business.

Greeny so far has demonstrated improvements in how he conducts himself online. I still question how little about his role was changed in response to 12 leader signatures. Nonetheless, I wish us not to linger on it. Buck up, and move forward. RFCP has dealt with challenges like this before and will continue to persevere.

Next were three quick polls presented to the leaders on the matter of colonies and declarations of war. With RFCP and DD provoking questions and strong opinions about the nature of a “colony” on CPA, a vote was presented to the leaders in leaders’ chat on this subject. What is a colony? How is it different than an ally? What should colonies be allowed to do?

All of my votes can be recognized by the slight highlighting of blue over the button I clicked. You can infer for yourself which polls passed and which did not pass by counting the numbers. Accept that those polls that passed are now CPA law.

(To the above poll: Interestingly, the same poll was presented 48 hours before showing a very low voter turnout and resulting in 10-9 in favor that armies should be allowed to declare no colonies (many of the votes were RPF and Cosmic). Cobra of EGCP and I pushed for the poll to be reposted, and the results were staggeringly in favor of not allowing armies to declare no colonies).

All in all, three very logical and productive polls were carried through. This last poll prevents armies from declaring war with no servers, as the other participating army could do nothing in the war but defend. It segues into our next topic about Cosmic.

The Curious Case of Cosmic

Cosmic has perplexed the majority of army politicians in CPA. Its leader, Pyxel, has confusing motives. Why show merciless aggression against GSG during the Chronic Wars only to surrender your servers? Why give said servers to LGA, but refuse to be their colony? Why have Cosmic leaders army-hopped, only to return affectionately to Cosmic, as with the case of co-leader Langley?

On August 21, RFCP invaded Cosmic’s capital, and therefore its last and only server, Skates. The scheduled invasion evoked only the sound of crickets. Cosmic, which operates on AUS times, did not acknowledge the planned event. So it was little surprise to RFCP that LGA arrived in Cosmic’s place, donning Cosmic uniform.

Fast forward to last Friday. Cosmic, after a period of silence (brewing and plotting, it seems), attempted to declare war on PZF.

The war declaration included these terms:

1. No allies. 2. All servers successfully captured by Cosmic will be auto-transferred to the Lime Green Army

Ladies and gentleman, allow me to introduce you to the savagery of EGCP leader, felix/Guta:

And you already know the savagery that is Cena. Truly, I love our army’s friends.

The war was not put forth as the poll you read about in the previous section nullified Cosmic’s right to wage war without having any servers of its own.

RPF Declares War on EGCP

One army certainly within its jurisdiction to declare war is RPF.

The declaration created ripples of buzz for the first day, especially since RPF’s reasons for the war, stated in a blog post, targeted EGCP’s morality, referring to examples of inappropriately sexual and racial remarks by the Latin army’s hicom. QueenieLiz, RPF Rebel Commander, even made this appeal to the NVA leaders:

Naturally, the two armies clashed on Discord. The following screenshot from QueeneLiz was in reply to a counterargument Cobroso (Cobra) made…

…which Cobra promptly copypasta’ed. Seven times.

In an interview with DMT about the war, Edu said, “I’m deeply sad. I’m currently planning to kill myself.”

He was of course being flippant, in tune with the savagery characteristic of an EGCP leader.

My firm support of our Brazilian brothers will not be relaxed. Cookky condemned any sexually inappropriate remarks, Cobra condemned any racially inappropriate remarks, and it is possible that the charges against them lack an element of devilish humor.

On the other hand, I admire Queenie as a woman commanding the largest Club Penguin army. Her post mentions that one leader left the Cuddle Kittens’ battle after she was called a cow. That leader was me. She has my warmth and compliments and I hope for a less viscous community in our future; but not for one lacking color, which EGCP brings in droves.

What excitement the war declaration stirred quickly dissipated. So far, EGCP has not shown to the first three battles. But one should not expect so quickly that a greater strategy of retribution is not up their sleeves.

DD Declares Independence

Duck Defenders, with my blessing and encouragement, declared independence from RFCP and renamed themselves the Duck Knight Army. We gave them the server, Skate, and enjoyed that our former colony was claiming the capital of LGA’s colony. We remain close allies, and I will miss the colonists calling me Uncle Prior.

Unrelated, but on that note, we also transferred back GSG’s servers which we had been guarding for them, as all their threats are off the map.

If any RFCP soldier has questions still after this post, leave a comment or contact an available officer.

So much has happened; so much to happen yet.

–Commander Prior Bumble

RFCP

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FROM THE DESK OF PRIOR BUMBLE, COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF OF THE RECON FEDERATION OF CLUB PENGUIN

Soldiers,

You are due an analysis, and maybe even a manifesto, of the current political situation of CPA and where RFCP stands within it. So much has developed this month. Part of the Constitution we are drafting for RFCP includes an article obliging the Commander of the RFCP to be transparent with his troops in how he moves and votes in foreign affairs. Most of this post will satisfy that responsibility.

The map of CPA is deadlocked. No one can move, save for RPF and WN, who engage in touch-and-run skirmishes. The Treaty of Smog and Citrus, which ended the War of Smoke and Sour, forbids the NVA from attacking LGA, LGA from attacking the NVA, and LGA from assisting RPF. Further, RFCP is of course obliged to not target any brother NVA member. Cosmic Army, led by rosefarri and lapis, has been squashed out as a colony of the LGA. Red Rebellion is off the map currently. Attacking RPF is the only legal action anyone can take (except for attacking the Wild Ninjas, discussed in the next paragraph), and no one is willing to provoke its ire.

The Wild Ninjas, a Spanish army allied with the Brazilian EGCP (but not with the entire NVA), are the only ones who wield flexibility. They have attempted unsuccessful invasions of RPF on CPR, and scheduled but canceled one invasion of WH.

For a short time, Wild Ninjas were scheduled to join the NVA. This was an error of one NVA leader extending the invitation without consent of the other leaders. Most expressed a casual stance of welcoming regardless. I opposed. The NVA is a large alliance; it provides safety, but it cripples growth. Living off the social security check of EGCP or RPF protection will cause an army wither with the lack of necessity to grow and campaign. We are challenged in that we both love our relationships, and hunger with ambition.

Wild Ninjas ended up not joining the NVA because their scheduled-and-then-canceled invasion of WH broke the trust of the NVA. They operate on SuperCPPS frequently and are mere tenths of a point behind us in the Top Ten ranking at #5 (we hit #4, our highest yet, this past Sunday).

Something strange happens when a political deadlock like the one present occurs. Leaders stop polishing guns and start swirling brandy in their glasses. Instead of shouting orders, they think. And thus, leaders on CPA are talking. Even ones that don’t often do.

In the past week, I have had a two-hour-long conversation with admin DMT, an hour long conversation with Ultipenguin of the RPF, and an unexpected but welcomed discussion with hippieFRESH of LGA in separate private messages.

DMT and I share a love of CPA politics. We touched upon many topics therein, including the Recruitment Crisis occurring throughout all the armies after CPR’s crackdown on discord sharing. This will surely lead to a depression, unless swift alternative strategy is implemented. CPR is comfortable with RPF after so many years of their presence, but other armies do not enjoy this familiarity on the populated CPPS ripe for recruitment. Mopia, on the other extreme, recedes rapidly from the picture after their retreat from CPR, and the future of this iconic army, known for using voice chat in leading battles and exhibiting lightning fast acrobatics, is uncertain.

The admins of CPA have proposed a vote to the leaders as to whether 23 more servers should be added to the map. I voted in favor of this, but I mentioned that it would buy us only a little more time until we are deadlocked again, only with more servers and with a larger splattering of color on the screen.

What we need are new armies and new frontiers. A new desirable like resources could be added to the CPA operation — perhaps White House has gold, while Fog has lumber. This would add more to the need for servers and could frustrate old alliances and require rethinking. But it’s a whole different process.

During the WH/PZF tournament battle, Ultipenguin of the RPF sat next to me on the log at the Cove. Interestingly, RFCP and RPF have never been direct enemies; only opposed by the relationships we honor. Interested to converse with him, I noted one glaring and coincidental similarity between RPF and RFCP: our militant culture. I asked Ultipenguin if RPF enforces their soldiers to address leaders as “sir,” the way I do in RFCP.

So compelling was the conversation that we took it to DM’s. Ranks are a prominent part of RPF culture, but aren’t as enforced in interpersonal relations as they are here in our army. It was Ulti’s perspective that because RFCP is not yet so large, it can be endearing to call me “sir” or “Commander,” but this may be a trait of RFCP’s difficult to keep non-problematic as it grows. I replied, “Having a large size and having personal connection isn’t exclusive, just challenging. I won’t be shedding RFCP’s ‘sir’ bit, but I hope to reinvent what the leaders of old have corrupted.”

Conversation then turned to the NVA. Obviously, the NVA is of great interest to an RPF leader, as its purpose now seems primarily to rebuff the tidal waves RPF generates. I suggested that time may force the nature of the NVA to shift. Perhaps in the future, NVA will remain an alliance, but be activated only to defend against RPF. In such a world, WH could invade GSG, but if GSG is invaded by NVA, the coalition unites and are obliged to defend. This may never happen; or, given that NVA consumes half of the active armies, there may be no other choice.

The RPF leaders remain full of respect for myself and our army, something to be proud of (note: JDZenith is Ultipenguin).

With hippieFRESH, the conversation began more rockily; him referring to a misunderstanding/rumor floating around about my motives. I corrected him, but we soon slipped into tranquil conversing over politics yet again. It became clear that neither Fresh nor I are eager to resume LGA-RFCP conflict come August 27th. But where else do we lead? At some point, we’ll burst with, “Holy shit, someone DO SOMETHING.”

Another RPF-EGCP war maybe, instead of LGA-RFCP? What else is new?

Perhaps a renewal of our rivalry is inevitable. But both parties hunger for new frontiers – new enough to find success, but not to entangle ourselves in a conflict we cannot gain from, such as one with RPF (…yet). The Wild Ninjas still mysteriously operate with independent fury in the east…

Finally, in a last-ditch effort to bring harmony between the two army leagues, CPA and CPO, a merger was placed on the table for the leaders to decide on today. This without doubt would solve many deadlock problems. An avalanche of new armies, relations, and turmoil would refresh our pool, including well known armies such as the Pirates, Templars, Help Force, and Light Troops. Hell, there’d even be a perfect rival for PZF, the Pizza Clan. And for Winged Hussars, there is the Winged Army (!).

Problems immediately emerged, however. The terms declared that CPR would need to be entirely removed from the map (including our capital, Marshmallow), and that no other news sites were permissible. Both terms were insisted upon under the guise of “safety requirements.” However, totalitarianism will always encourage you to trade freedom for safety. I vehemently opposed both terms, alongside Sage of Mopia and Edu of EGCP. The CPO admins were not budging (conducive to the flavor of CPO elitism in the chat), and, after a long and arduous stream of messages, CPA pulled the plug. We remain grateful to DMT, flen, Greeny, Memmaw, and Super for their admirable and honest work as CPA admins.

A short vote in the leaders’ channel followed to see if the leaders wanted to merge.

I voted no, with a stipulation comment that even found common ground among newly-on-leave LGA leader Zeke.

No such changes were amenable to CPO. The brief glimmer of hope was over.

But how interesting would a CPA v.s CPO all-out war be…I admit excitement and a thirst to be strategizing in a war room with all the great leaders of CPA on behalf of the RFCP.

I will continue to maneuver us into the greatest position of power we can secure at this time. If we wish to stay in the top 4 of CPA’s Top Ten, we need to toughen, sharpen, and stand undaunted by the challenges ahead, both politically and in face of the academic recession looming before us.

I am undaunted.

Are you?

— Commander Prior Bumble

RFCP

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