Recon Federation of Club Penguin

NORTHERN LIGHTS, UKAHALA: All seems normal in the RFCP server, except there’s a smell of maple syrup in the air…

The Recon Federation of Club Penguin server has been blowing up lately with the demands for a mysterious brand-new division.

Yes, a Canada Division. The questions now arise…where did this idea come from, and, more importantly:

Thank you for asking the hard-hitting questions, Anilia.

What is this mysterious place that seems to be the USA’s hat? Does it really exist? We don’t think so. However, we questioned RFCP’s resident Canadian, General Sillabye (The Queen of Furbies and Canada, who hails from Canada). 

That was… informative? Sorry, eh? Well, for those unfamiliar with Canada, we shall give a brief history!

Canada was founded in 1867. It is often called the “Great White North” because of the false belief it is eternally winter there. We have seasons, you know? Unless you live in Nunavut, but no one remembers Nunavut. Out of the six people that live in Nunavut, I doubt any of you are reading this, anyways. (For legal reasons that’s a joke.)  Home to Moose, Hockey (Papa’s favorite sport), and Maple Syrup on a stick, Canada is often overshadowed by its obnoxiously loud older brother, except when it comes to kicking their butts in the Winter Olympics. But Canada will be overshadowed no more!

Maple syrup on a stick is real. Beat that the rest of the world.

As you can see, Canada is dearly beloved in the RFCP. Many soldiers have mentioned their wish to visit/move there, even the occasional person dreaming about the brilliant country. 

Is Canada even relevant to RFCP? Or just in general? Well the answer is clear:

Canada really is “v relevant” though.

It seems the country of Canada has infected the server, but how deep does this go? It seems the newest channel to the server, #ohgoshwhydidweletsillahaveafurbychannel, somehow is in Canada. We’re not sure how that works either.

But where did this idea of a “C A N A D A D I V I S I O N” come from? Well, this hard-working reporter was able to find the first mention of this mysterious division.

Through our investigation, we were able to find out a few details about the division. First of all, this division will be called the RFCP Mounties. The division will be composed of Canadians only. The division will recruit by asking Canadians politely, who will be too nice to say no, to join. The motto of the division will be, “We’re sorry aboot that, eh?”

Now you must be asking, who are the Mounties? Well, you uncultured swine, here is an image of the magnificent mountains:



Mounties, these glorious Canadians, are members of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police or the RCMP (which is close to RFCP, so obviously this is a match made in heaven). Unfortunately, no, they do not ride moose or polar bears, despite how cool that would be. Instead, they’re stuck on a dumb horse. Seems like a fail, Canada, hurry up and change that. The Mounties are the pillar of every Canadian community. Despite their horrible implications of the founding, they are seen as one of the most defining things about Canada. Honestly, these seem faker than Canada’s monopoly money, but we assure you the Mounties are real.

Try to tell which is real, because we can’t.

Canada’s money is so famously weird, there’s a whole song about it. It is ritually sung to Canadian children in schools, so they are able to learn what the names of all their money is.

Despite the obvious support for the division, is it possible? Could the RFCP really have a Canada division? Well, first reports from Commander Coolj showed a possibility, however nothing had been confirmed.



But there is also evidence that Commander Coolj may be against a Canada Division, perhaps even Canada as a whole.

#FahrenheitIsStupid

We reached out to Commander Coolj to get confirmation on whether or not this division was happening . This is what he had to say:

Well there you have it folks, after October 16, 2023 (or earlier, Canada doesn’t have a set election date and it’s confusing) the RFCP will have its own Canada Division, a first for Club Penguin armies! We can’t wait to see what comes from the Mounties!

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving to all our friends in Canada!

Filed under: Satire/Humor