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Treasury of RFCP Releases Two New Bank Notes

And soldiers are opening their wallets in hopes to be the first ever recipients of them. Today, the Treasury added two new bank notes, a $10 and a $1,000, to its repertoire of $500, $100, $50, $20, $5, $1, and –$10 (for fining). A fun contest was set in place to welcome the new currency.

Guesses ranged from Waffle to Dab0n to Der. Now, without further ado, EXCLUSIVE to RFCP blog, we reveal them!

And dang! What beauties. Our correspondents sat down with the designer of the bills, Commander Prior Bumble, to talk about what makes them unique.

BLOG: Thanks for your time, Mr. Bumble.

PRIOR: Oh, don’t be so formal. You can call me sir.

BLOG: [laughs] Uh huh. We’ve seen a lot of you lately, sir.

PRIOR: Busy man.

BLOG: Yes, you are. So, tell us about these bills. First of all, why $10 and $1,000?

PRIOR: Besides being natural increments in many economies, we printed the $10 specifically to address the new Patrol division payouts–which is $15 a patrol. We are actually thinking about reducing that pay to $10 a patrol so that it’s easier for officers to conduct payroll. They’ll only need to send one bill instead of three ($5, $5, $5). We’ll compensate that by raising the maximum patrols per day and maybe even increasing recruitment pay from $25 to $30 permanently. There’s some inflation that needs adjusting.

BLOG: Is the market affected by that inflation?

PRIOR: My wallet is lol. I’m the one who fills every marketplace order in the RFCP store.

BLOG: Soldiers work hard for those prizes!

PRIOR: Yes, they do. It is my honor to redeem those prizes for them.

BLOG: You mentioned in the server that these two bills are your favorite to date. Can you tell us why?

PRIOR: Favorite besides my own–the $100. But these ones are wildly unique.

BLOG: How so?

PRIOR: They’re full of code.

BLOG: Whaaat?

PRIOR: Both of them.

BLOG: Tell us how so.

PRIOR: Nope. People will have to figure it out themselves. But every symbol and secret message has significance to the army.

BLOG: Wow.

PRIOR: The colors are nice too. Very different.

BLOG: Now, let’s talk about the obvious. Opino.

PRIOR: Of course lol.

BLOG: He gets the thousand.

PRIOR: Of course.

BLOG: But isn’t it tradition in the bank to only feature RFCP figures no longer active duty, except yourself?

PRIOR: Yes, it is. We made the same exception for him that we made for me. He is only featured while still active duty because he was the second Commander.

BLOG: Does that make you the first and the third Commander, since you resumed the helm?

PRIOR: [laughs]. No. I will always be the first. We all know I’m irrevocably Commander. Always was and always shall be. Alpha and omega.

BLOG: Humble, aren’t you?

PRIOR: No.

BLOG: Why doesn’t his name plate reflect his current rank, Commissar?

PRIOR: We chose Red Baron because he was the first Red Baron.

BLOG: And the first Commissar is on your $10.

PRIOR: Yes. The $10 is Redovyco, or 082, our first Commissar. Redovyco is still enlisted RFCP but no longer active duty–he is the Dean of our University now, and so the time is perfect to place him and his accomplishments on the bill.

BLOG: The theme is very recon.

PRIOR: As is he.

BLOG: Last question. Will that $1,000 be given out sparingly?

PRIOR: Ohhh, yes. My Tommy Bahama wallet can’t take much more lol.

BLOG: Goes with the Hawaiian shirts.

PRIOR: You know it.

BLOG: Thanks for your time, Prior.

[Prior gives us a shrewd a look]

BLOG: Sir.

PRIOR: Thanks, Doug.

So, fire up those workers’ unions and start earning your new bills, RFCP. We look forward to seeing stocks soar.


Notice references to a brand new RFCP division called the Patrol, and an active university in the army? RFCP blog has your back! Two new posts on these exciting developments out soon!

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